I'll be your gravity, you be my oxygen
by s4ndstorm
Summary: Silverstream makes Sandstorm feel safe. Makes her feel loved. Then Silverstream tells her she is expecting Graystripe's kits. Sandstorm feels the ground crumbling underneath her paws. Unfinished.


¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

* * *

The sound of wind rushing through the trees mingled with the loud roar of the river at the border between ThunderClan and RiverClan territories, the lands shrouded in darkness. A light ginger she-cat paced back and forth along the faintly moonlit shore, her tail swishing in impatience. Her ears pricked and she sighed in relief when she saw a silver tabby she-cat emerge from the rushing waters.

The small ginger cat's snarky hiss faded to a worried mew as the chubby silver tabby wove around her, drenching her fluffy pelt.

"Silverstream! It's about time you showed up! I was worried you'd forgotten..."

A soft purr sounded from Silverstream, who looked at the ginger cat and quickly looked away, a shadow cast over her face.

"You know I'd never forget about you, Sandy."

Sandstorm frowned, studying the other cat's expression. "Something wrong?" She murmured, her eyes narrowing in concern. Silverstream forced herself to meet the intimidating pale green gaze.

The silver she-cat looked away again, and quietly muttered a few words. Words she knew Sandstorm didn't want to hear.

"I'm expecting kits. Graystripe's kits."

The fur along Sandstorm's spine rose, and she dug her claws into the soft ground to stop herself from shaking.

"B-but how?!" she stuttered, dismay evident in her voice.

She couldn't believe this was true. She knew Silverstream often met up with her Clanmate, but she didn't think they were _that_ close.

A hint of a smile crossed Silverstream's face, vanishing as quickly as it appeared.

"Surely you know how kits are made...right?"

"That's not what I _meant._ " the smaller cat hissed in annoyance. "How _could_ you? Do I mean nothing to you? Has all of this been for no-"

Silverstream cut her off. "I didn't mean for it to happen, it was just in the heat of the moment. I'm sorry."

The ginger she-cat sat down, hurt and anger still evident in her gaze. She sighed and stared at the ground for a moment, only to look up again.

Silverstream's ear twitched. "I'm not in love with him, Sandstorm."

Sandstorm stood up, and looked at the other cat. "My Clanmates will be wondering where I am. Shouldn't you be in your nest?" she murmured coldly, turning away from Silverstream.

She sprinted away, back to the ThunderClan camp, her chest tightening and her heart racing. By the time she entered through the gorse barrier, Sandstorm was shaking badly, trying to convince herself that it was from the cold, trying to ignore the feeling of panic that arose.

Silverstream had always made her feel safe. Made her feel _loved._ Now she just felt betrayed and confused.

As Sandstorm made her way to the warriors den, she almost stepped on Graystripe, who was eating a mouse near the den's entrance. He gave her a friendly nod, but she couldn't look at the tom.

The ginger she-cat curled up in her nest, her claws tearing up the moss in frustration. Her ears flattened when a sleepy voice sounded from a nearby nest.

"Catch anything, Sandstorm? You were gone a while." The sentence was ended with a yawn.

"No, Fireheart, I didn't." Sandstorm hoped her tone would be enough to keep the tom cat quiet.

Unfortunately for Sandstorm, Fireheart seemed interested in a conversation. He was one of her closest friends, but she did not want to talk to anyone right now.

"That's unusual, you're the best hunter in the Clan!" Fireheart exclaimed, then muttering a "Sorry." to Dustpelt, who had told him to shut up.

Sandstorm rolled her eyes and hoped he would buy her over-used excuse. "All the prey is hiding in its burrows, maybe if I had gone out earlier I would have caught something."

"Maybe. By the way, you didn't happen to scent Tigerclaw anywhere, did you?" Fireheart whispered, an edge of nervousness to his voice.

"No, Fireheart." Sandstorm muttered again. "I went towards Sunningrocks. He wouldn't come this far into our territory. Go to sleep."

The tom still wanted to talk. "You seem to be hunting near the RiverClan border a lot.."

"Goodnight, Fireheart."

"Anyway, I still think Tigerclaw could show up anywhere. We have to be careful. I'll set extra patrols, and-" He was cut off by an angry hiss.

" _Goodnight,_ Fireheart!" Sandstorm snapped, putting her paws over her ears. The tom, at her hiss, had sighed and put his head down, much to the relief of the other cats in the den. He may be the Clan deputy, but he still needed to learn to shut up when other cats were trying to sleep.

* * *

Sandstorm did not sleep well. Her dreams were filled with Graystripe and Silverstream weaving around each other, proclaiming their love in hushed whispers.

The ginger she-cat didn't want to look. She felt like it killing her.

She felt the same strange feeling she felt before, like she was choking, her heart pounding, she was trembling. Then, the ground beneath her paws began to shake and crumble, falling apart and taking Sandstorm with it.

She woke up, hyperventilating, safe in her nest. The ground was intact, and she was okay. She was okay. Okay. Sandstorm had to keep telling herself that she would be fine, though she felt like Silverstream had personally ripped her to pieces with her own claws.

She jumped when Fireheart's voice sounded near her ear.

"Why do you smell like RiverClan?" the tom hissed suspiciously.

* * *

 _This is the first fanfiction I have attempted to write in a long time._

 _-Please correct any grammar/spelling mistakes you see._

 _-The story's title is a reference to Bring Me The Horizon's song 'Follow You', which features the lines "Come sink into me and let me breathe you in. I'll be your gravity, you be my oxygen." I chose that particular line as in this AU Sandstorm has an anxiety disorder._

 _-Criticism is welcomed!_

 _This story is set between Forest of Secrets and Rising Storm, an AU where Silverstream and Sandstorm are both pansexual and are (almost) in a relationship, and Silverstream hasn't died. However, the original storyline must still relate somehow. If I end up continuing this story, you'll see certain cats' relationships end, and certain cats' relationships develop into something more (with a very possible polyamorous relationship on the cards)._


End file.
